六级写作范文及点评：大学生的压力汇集

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venkatmba 2008-08-16 12:06 | 只看楼主 树型| 收藏| 小中大 1 ^#

六级写作范文及点评：大学生的压力汇集

很多人都认为那些身处象牙塔的大学生们过得很安逸，其实不然。他们每天也要面临着很多压力：高额学费带来的经济压力，父母要求过高所带来的精神压力…
　　College Pressure
　　I see two kinds of pressure working on college students today: economic pressure, parental pressure. It is easy to look around for rebels — to blame the colleges for charging too much money, the parents for pushing them too far. But there are no rebels, only victims.
　　The pressure is heavy on students who just want to graduate and get a job. If I were an employer I would rather employ graduates who have this range and curiosity than those who narrowly pursued safe subjects and high grades. I know incalculable students whose inquiring minds cheer me. I like to hear the play of their ideas. I don’t know if they are getting A or C, and I don’t care. I also like them as people. The country needs them, and they will find satisfying jobs. I tell them to relax, but they can’t.
　　Nor can I blame them. They live in a brutal economy. Today it is not unusual for a student, even if he works part time at college and full time during the summer, to increase to 5, 000 in loans after graduation.Encouraged at commencement to go forth into the world, he is already behind as he goes forth. How could he not feel under pressure throughout college to prepare for this day of reckoning①?
　　Along with economic pressure goes parental pressure. Inevitably, the two are deeply integrated.
　　Poor students! They are caught in one of the oldest webs of love and duty and guilt. The parents mean well: they are trying to steer their sons and daughters toward a secure future. But the sons and daughters want to major in history or classics or philosophy—subjects with no “practical” value. Where’s the payoff on the humanities? It’s not easy to persuade such loving parents that the humanities do indeed pay off. The intellectual faculties developed by studying subjects like history and classics are just the faculties that make creative leaders in business or almost any general field.
　　Luckily for me, most of them got into their field by an indirect route, to their surprise, after many roundabout ways. They can hardly conceive of a career that was not preplanned. They can hardly imagine allowing the hand of God or chance to nudge them down some unforeseen trail.
　　［391 words］
　　行文点评
　　本文脉络清晰。第一段第一句直接点题，提出大学生面临的两种压力：economic pressure和 parental pressure。段末“victims”一词的运用，奠定了本文的感情基调：作者对大学生担负的压力感到同情。
　　第二段和第三段中分析了大学生在经济上面临压力的原因。第四段是过渡段。第五段阐述了父母的压力对大学生的影响，用一个感叹句开头，具有烘托感情的效果,充分表达了作者对大学生的同情。最后一段排比句的应用从相反的方面描述，更把大学生所遭受的压力凸显出来。
　　好文妙译
　　大学生的压力
　　我发觉今天的大学生有两种压力：经济压力和来自父母的压力。环顾四周，你很容易发现一些叛逆者，他们指责学校收费太高，报怨父母对他们的要求过高。但他们不是叛逆者，而是受害者。
　　对于那些只想从大学毕业并且找到一个工作的人来说，压力是很大的。如果我是雇主，我宁愿雇佣那些有好奇心的博学之才而不是那些只选一些容易过的且能达高分的课程的学生。我认识无数学生，他们的好奇之心使我兴奋不已。我喜欢听他们阐述自己的观点。我不知道他们得的是A还是C，我不在乎这些。我也同样喜欢他们所散发出来的人性魅力。国家需要他们，他们也会找到自己满意的工作。我告诉他们要放松，但他们做不到。
　　但我也不能责怪他们，因为他们生活在残酷的经济时代。今天对一个学生来说，即使他在念书时兼职打工，在暑假全职工作，在毕业后欠下5000美元的债务也是很平常的。在毕业典礼上他们被告知即将踏入社会，而事实上，在踏入社会之际他已落后于他人了。为了面对这个清算日，他们在大学生活中怎会感受不到压力呢?
　　与经济压力同时存在的还有来自父母的压力，这两者不可避免地融合在一起。
　　可怜的学生们!他们被古老的爱、责任、负疚感所包围。父母们本意是好的,他们正把自己的儿女引向一个安全的未来。但这些孩子却想主修历史、古典文学、哲学这些没有“现实”价值的专业。学人文科学的报偿在何处呢?要说服父母相信人文科学有所报偿并不容易。由学习历史和古典文学所培养出来的能力正是商业及其他一般领域有创造力的领导人所必备的能力。
　　幸运的是，许多学生几经曲折终于到达他们自己的领域，对此他们感到吃惊。因为他们很难想象可以从事一项未经事先计划的事业，很难想象上帝之手或者机缘能把他们推到未曾预见到的人生轨道上来。
　　词汇斟酌
　　rebel n.反叛分子，反对者
　　victim n.牺牲品，受害者
　　curiosity n.好奇(心)
　　brutala.残忍的,无情的，冷酷的
　　commencement n.①开始②毕业典礼，学位授予典礼
　　reckoning n.结算，清算
　　inevitably ad.不可避免地
　　steer vt.引导
　　faculty n.能力，技能，天赋
　　roundabout a.绕道的，绕圈子的
　　conceive vi.(of)构想出，设想
　　nudge vt.用肘轻推，推进
　　佳句临摹
　　①【注释】a day of reckoning 得到惩罚的日子
　　【临摹】You’re enjoying yourself now, but a day of reckoning will come.别看你现在逍遥，将来会遭报应的。
　　思如泉涌
　　No sweet without sweat. 先苦后甜。
　　Pain past is pleasure. 过去的痛苦就是快乐。

venkatmba 最后编辑于 2008-08-16 12:08:30

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venkatmba 2008-08-16 12:07 | 只看楼主 树型| 收藏| 小中大 2 ^#

回复：六级写作范文及点评：大学生的压力

考试，作为检验教育结果的一种手段，已经存在了数千年。它简直无处不在，无时不有…
　　Examinations Exert a Negative

　　Influence on Education We might marvel at the progress made in every field of study, but the methods of testing a person’s knowledge and ability remain as primitive as ever they were. It is really extraordinary that after all these years, educationists have still failed to devise anything more efficient and reliable than examinations. For all the pious claim that examinations test what you know, it is common knowledge that they more often do the exact opposite. They may be a good means of testing memory, or the knack of working rapidly under extreme pressure, but they can tell you nothing about a person’s true ability and aptitude.

　　As anxiety makers, examinations are second to none①. That is because so much depends on them. They are the mark of success or failure in our society. Your whole future may be decided in one fateful day. The moment a child begins school, he enters a world of sharp competition where success and failure are clearly defined and measured. Can we wonder at the increasing number of drop-outs: young people who are written off as utter failures before they have even begun a career②? Can we be surprised at the suicide rate among students?

　　A good education should, among other things, train you to think for yourself. The examination system does anything but that. What has to be learnt is rigidly laid down by a syllabus, so the student is encouraged to memories. Examinations do not motivate a student to read widely, but to restrict his reading; they do not enable him to seek more and more knowledge, but induce cramming. The most successful candidates are not always the best educated; they are the best trained in the technique of working under pressure.

　　［299 words］

　　行文点评

　　本文是一篇典型的三段论文章。在第一段中，作者表明了自己的观点：考试不能说明一个人真正的能力和资质。第二段阐述了把考试作为检验成功与否的标准给学生带来的负面影响。第三段从教育的目的上说明考试根本不能训练人独立思维的能力。

　　文章每一段都有一定的特色。开头段用的是现象描述法，先概括文章内容涉及的现状，然后引出主题。中间段的末尾处接连用两个问句，引起读者关于考试弊端的思考。结尾段则用一组排比句：“...do not... but to...;...do not...but...，”来增强气势，突出强调考试的负面影响，深化了文章的主题。

　　好文妙译

　　考试对教育的负面影响

　　每一个学科领域所取得的进步都可能让我们称奇，然而用于测试一个人的学识和能力的方式却仍和从前一样原始。经过这么多年，教育者们仍没能创立出一种比考试更有效、更可靠的方法，这实在是不可思议。尽管有很多人虔诚地宣称考试可以测出你掌握的知识，却仍有这样一个共识，即考试所收到的效果往往与之相悖。考试或许是一种测验记忆力的好方法，或者是让人在极端压力下快速工作的诀窍,但是它却一点儿也不能说明一个人真正的能力和才智。

　　考试作为“焦虑症制造者”是无人能及的。这是因为有那么多事情都依赖着考试。考试在我们的社会中是成功或失败的标志。在具有决定意义的某一天，你的一生可能就被决定了。一个孩子步入学校大门那一刻起，他便步入了一个竞争残酷的世界。在那里，成功和失败都被清晰地加以界定和衡量。辍学者的数量日渐增加——那些年轻人甚至还没有开始工作便被认为是彻底的失败者——对此，我们难道不感到惊奇吗?对学生的自杀率难道我们能无动于衷吗？

　　除了其他目的之外，良好的教育应该能训练人独立思维的能力。考试却根本做不到这一点。教学大纲生硬地规定了学生必须学些什么，这便鼓励了学生去死记硬背。考试不但未能激发学生去广泛地阅读，反而限制了他们的阅读范围。它不但未能促使学生去探求更多的知识，反而导致了死记硬背。最成功的应试者往往不是受教育最好的人，他们只不过是在应付工作压力的技巧方面训练有素罢了。

　　词汇斟酌

　　marvel vi.(at)惊叹，赞佩

　　pious a.虔诚的

　　aptitude n.(学习方面的)才能，资质，天资

　　drop-outn. 辍学者

　　suicide n.①自杀②自取灭亡

　　lay down 规定，制定

　　syllabus n.课程大纲

　　induce vt.引起，导致

　　cramming n.突击式学习；填鸭式教学

　　佳句临摹

　　①【注释】second to none 不亚于任何人或事物

　　【临摹】As a dancer, he is second to none.他的舞艺无人能出其右。

　　②【注释】write sb/sth off 认为某人或某事物已经失败

　　【临摹】He lost this match, but don’t write him off as a future champion.他输了这场比赛，但不要以为他以后当不了冠军。

　　思如泉涌

　　There are obviously two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live. 教育显然有两种：一种是教人怎样谋生，另一种是教人怎样生活。

　　A fool can ask more questions than seven wise men can answer. 一愚发问，七智结舌。

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venkatmba 2008-08-16 12:07 | 只看楼主 树型| 收藏| 小中大 3 ^#

六级范文及点评：伟大的作品使人头脑敏锐

何为伟大的作品?其伟大之处在哪里?既然是伟大的作品，为何人们又望而却步、不想去读呢?本文作者就这几个问题进行了深入探讨。
　　Great Books Sharpen Our Minds

　　Great books are those that contain the best materials on which the human mind can work in order to gain insight, understanding, and wisdom. Each of them, in its own way, raises the recurrent basic questions which men must face. Because these questions are never completely solved, these books are the sources and monuments of a continuing intellectual tradition.

　　Garl Van Doren once referred to great books as “the books that never have to be written again.” They are the rare, perfect achievements of sustained excellence. Their beauty and clarity show that they are masterpieces of the fine as well as of the liberal arts. Such books are justifiably called great whether they are books of science, poetry, theology, mathematics, or politics.

　　The richness of great books shows itself in the many levels of meaning they contain. They lend themselves to a variety of interpretations. This does not mean they are ambiguous or that their integrity is compromised. The different interpretations complement one another and allow the reader to discover the unity of the work from a variety of perspectives. We need not read other books more than once to get all that they have to say. But we can always go deeper into great books. As sources of enlightenment they are inexhaustible.

　　The interest in many good books that are written is limited to a definite period of history. They do not exhibit the universal appeal that results from dealing with the fundamental questions which confront men in all times and places and in a way that men in all times and places can understand. Great books, on the contrary, transcend the provincial limits of their origin①. They remain as world literature. The ones we are sure are great are the ones men everywhere turn to again and again through the centuries.

　　［310 words］

　　行文点评

　　文章一开始先解释什么是“伟大的作品”。紧接着在第二段中引用名人对“伟大的作品”的解释，增强文章的说服力。第三段介绍伟大作品的内容丰富、涵义深刻的特点。最后一段将好书与伟大作品进行比较，得出伟大作品的另一个特点：伟大的作品没有历史的局限性。

　　好文妙译

　　伟大的作品使人头脑敏锐

　　伟大的作品是那些包含有最佳素材的书籍，人们可以学习这些素材以期获得洞察力、理解力和智慧。每部伟大的作品都以自己的方式提出一些生活中不断出现而且人们又必须面对的基本问题。因为这些问题从来没有被彻底解决，所以这些书成了一种持续不断的知识传统的源泉和丰碑。

　　卡尔·多伦曾把伟大的作品称为“永远不需要再写的书”。它们都是保持着卓越水平的罕见的完美之作。它们的显著与清晰表明它们不仅是文学作品，也是杰出名著。这样的书，不论它描述地是科学、诗词、神学、数学，还是政治方面，都无可非议地被称作是伟大的作品。

　　伟大作品的丰富内涵可以在其多个不同意义层次上显示出来。它们可以有多种不同的解释。这并不意味着它们表意暧昧或在完整性上有所折衷。不同的解释彼此互补，而且让读者从不同的角度发现作品的统一性。其他的书我们只要读一遍就能了解它们要说的全部。但读伟大的作品时，我们总是可以深入探究。作为思想与知识启迪的源泉，它们会永不枯竭。

　　有许多好书，它们的重要性只限于某一特定的历史时期。它们没有展示出那种经久不衰的吸引力，而这种吸引力来源于用各个时代各个地区的所有人都能理解的方式来讨论各时代各地区的人都要面对的根本问题。相反，伟大的作品超越了它们的时空来源的狭隘局限。它们作为世界性的文学作品保存下来。那些我们确信是伟大作品的正是那些世界各地的人们几百年来一遍又一遍地读着的书。

　　词汇斟酌

　　recurrent a.再发生的, 周期性发生的, 循环的

　　monument n.纪念碑，纪念物，纪念馆

　　justifiably ad.合理地，无可非议地

　　ambiguous a.引起歧义的，模棱两可的，含糊不清的

　　integrity n. 完整，完全，完善

　　compromise vi.妥协,折中

　　complement vt.补充，与…相配

　　inexhaustible a.无穷无尽的

　　transcend vt.超出，超越(经验、理性、信念等)的范围

　　provincial a.偏狭的

　　佳句临摹

　　①【注释】on the contrary 与此相反，正相反

　　【临摹】It doesn’t seem ugly to me；on the contrary, I think it’s rather beautiful. 我觉得它并不丑，恰恰相反，它挺美。

　　思如泉涌

　　A good book is the best of friends, the same today and forever. 一本好书，相伴一生。

　　A fool attempting to be witty is an object of profoundest pity. 蠢人装聪明，实在最可怜。

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venkatmba 2008-08-16 12:08 | 只看楼主 树型| 收藏| 小中大 4 ^#

回复：六级写作范文及点评：大学生的压力

在日常生活中，我们常常需要作自我介绍。虽然是介绍最熟悉的自己，但是要想让别人听到以后有耳目一新的感觉却并不容易。来看看作者是怎样介绍她自己的。
　　Things about Me

　　I am Andrea. Perhaps the word “average”can best describe me. I am of average height, average weight and of average complexion. I have a thin face, double-lid eyes and a pointed nose. My hair is black, short and straight. I have never worn my hair long. I look like both my mother and my father, but I have inherited their best parts.

　　I am a teacher, and I like my job. I believe her or his students can sometimes teach a teacher. Actually I have learnt a lot from my own teaching experience and my students. One particularly good thing about being a teacher is that I am learning something new each day and thus making progress each day. This is wonderful. Of course the income is modest, but on the other hand, quite stable. I keep growing all the time. I find great rewards both monetarily and mentally.

　　I have many hobbies: reading books, raising pets, making dresses, etc. I like volleyball very much, but I can’t play it very often, because it is a team sport. It is difficult to get enough people to play volleyball with me. It’s a shame. I derive great pleasure from my hobbies①.

　　Generally speaking, I am open, honest and easy-going. I hate hypocrisy and injustice. Fairness is very important to me. I try to be fair in everything I do. I have great appreciation for physical and spiritual independence. I am a bit disorganized and impatient sometimes.

　　I don’t have many friends, but I do have a few. I have both male and female friends. We do sports together, go shopping together; and we exchange our views and ideas and share happiness and sadness. Of course we help each other if necessary.

　　I always consider myself a lucky person. I am lucky in my family, I am lucky in my career, I am lucky in my friendship, I am lucky in many things. In one word, I am lucky in life. I am really grateful for all these.

　　［338 words］

　　行文点评

　　作者由表及里地介绍了自己的方方面面。第一段围绕average一词描写了外貌，先让读者在感官上对“我”有了总体的印象。第二段介绍职业以及职业给“我”带来了什么。第三段介绍兴趣爱好。第四段简述性格特征。第五段叙述与朋友间的友谊。最后作者用了6个“lucky”来总结全文。

　　文中每一段的主题都十分鲜明。语言简朴真实，行文流畅，简洁而鲜活地刻画了一个真实的“我”。

　　好文妙译

　　自我介绍

　　我叫安德里亚。也许“普通”一词最能形容我。我中等身材，不胖也不瘦，不白也不黑。我有一张瘦削的脸，双眼皮，翘鼻子，我乌黑的头发又短又直，从未留过长发。我长得既像妈妈又像爸爸，不过我继承了他们的优点。

　　我现在是一名教师，我热爱我的工作。我认为，一个老师有时也能从他(她)的学生那儿学到知识。事实上，从我的教书经历，从我的学生们那里，我学到了许多许多。当老师特别好的一点就是每天我都在学习新的东西，并因此而能够每天取得进步。这真是棒极了。当然，收入并不高。然而，换个角度看，收入却是相当稳定的。我一直都在不断进步，在金钱方面与精神方面我都得到丰厚的回报。

　　我的兴趣广泛，比如：读书，养宠物，制作衣服，等等。虽然我非常喜欢打排球，但由于这是一项团队运动，我不能经常去玩。要找到足够多的人同我一起打排球是很难的，这是一件令人遗憾的事。兴趣爱好给我带来了无穷的乐趣。

　　总的说来，我是一个外向、诚实而随和的人。我对任何虚伪和不公正都深恶痛绝。我极为珍视公平公正，对于所做的每一件事，我都尽力做到公平。我崇尚物质上和精神上的独立。不过，我有点儿不善计划，有时还会急躁、没耐性。

　　我朋友不多，却颇有几个相知好友，其中有男性也有女性。我和朋友们一起进行体育运动；一起逛街购物。我们交换各自的观点看法，共享欢乐，分担忧愁。当然，如若需要，我们必定相互帮助。

　　我一直都觉得自己是一个幸运的人。在家庭方面、在事业上、在交友方面、在许许多多方面，我都是幸运的。总之，我的生活是幸运的，我真的非常感激这一切的一切。

　　词汇斟酌

　　complexion n.肤色，面色

　　monetarily ad. 从金钱角度

　　hypocrisy n.伪善，虚伪

　　佳句临摹

　　①【注释】derive sth from sth 从…获得…

　　【临摹】She derived no benefit from the course of drugs.她用了这个疗程的药后不见一点好转。

　　思如泉涌

　　To know oneself is true progress. 人贵有自知之明。

　　A good horse cannot be of a bad color. 良马的毛色不会差。

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venkatmba

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venkatmba 2008-08-16 12:09 | 只看楼主 树型| 收藏| 小中大 5 ^#

回复：六级写作范文及点评：大学生的压力汇集

六级写作经典范文及点评：求职信

时光飞逝，大学生活即将结束。随之要面临的是如何找一份称心工作的问题。找工作，得从求职信开始…
　　Job Application

　　May 22nd

　　Dear Mr. Cavendish,

　　I saw your advertisement in the local paper this evening，and I wonder if you would consider me for a job as a waiter this summer.

　　I am seventeen years old and at present I am studying English and economics. When I leave school, I hope to take a course in hotel management. During the school holidays last summer, I worked as a waiter at the Central Hotel. The headwaiter there, Mr. Macintosh, will be pleased to send you a recommendation for me.

　　I would prefer to work in your hotel in Filey because it is near my home. However, if there isn’t any job there for me, perhaps you could consider me for the Scarborough Hotel.

　　I would be pleased if you will send me information about the pay and conditions of the job to be offered. I will be free to begin work in the fourth week of July when the school holidays start.

　　Yours sincerely,

　　Peter Tuck

　　［168 words］

　　行文点评

　　这是一封典型的求职信。第一段开门见山，表明写信的目的是求职。同时，也注明了消息来源和应聘职位。第二段开始介绍求职者的情况，(注意：所写的情况最好能体现出你十分适合所应聘的职位)。信中第三段特别陈述了一个不情之请并说明原因。最后一段表明自己希望得到回复，并说明自己可以开始工作的具体时间。

　　这封信符合求职信的结构要求，语言简洁，语气礼貌大方。

　　好文妙译

　　求职信

　　亲爱的卡文迪斯先生：

　　我在今晚的地方报纸上看到了你们的广告，我想在这个夏天做一份服务生的工作，敬请考虑。

　　我十七岁，现在正在学习英文和经济学。毕业后，我希望能够学习酒店管理课程。去年暑假时，我在中央酒店作服务生。那儿的领班麦金托什先生会很乐意向您寄交一封关于我的推荐信。

　　我比较喜欢在您的费雷酒店工作，因为那儿离我家不远。但如果那儿没有我的工作机会，也许您可以考虑让我去斯卡伯勒酒店。

　　如果您能寄给我有关这份工作的薪水和工作环境的一些信息，我会非常高兴。我可以从七月的第四个星期开始工作，那时学校开始放假了。　

　　彼得·塔克

　　5月22日

　　词汇斟酌

　　recommendation n.推荐，介绍

　　思如泉涌

　　Will, work and wait are the pyramidal cornerstones for success. 意志、工作和等待是成功的基石。

　　A good beginning makes a good ending. 善始者必善其终。

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